The usual ramblings.

As I've said before, my beliefs have dramatically changed in the last few years. Sometimes it's easier to define what I don't believe (anymore) than what I do believe.

Warning: Opening a Can of Worms.

I don't believe anymore that the Bible is "inspired" (in the sense of divinely "dictated") nor infallible. Fallible people chose the books that were supposed to be part of the Bible (with some disagreement there, too, among different denominations!) and the fallible defined them as infallible and inspired. How does that work?

The next point would be, do I however still consider it a good book?

Define "good". Some parts to me, are beyond boring and utterly useless. A waste of time. They have no impact whatsoever on my life. They are n/a (non-applicable). Some other parts are absolutely beautiful and even helpful. So (as I said in my previous post) I pick and choose what can touch me in some way. I think that's true with many other books too, though.

Everybody picks and chooses. And most of the time a double standard is applied. For example those "christians" who strongly oppose Islam on the basis that the Koran is a violent book (therefore the religion is violent) ignore, or rationalize, the extreme violence found in the Bible. "But, we don't follow those teachings anymore!" Good for you. But, why don't you allow the muslims to say the same when they say they are peaceful? And please don't bring up terrorism and such, because christians have had their fair share of that! (although, I would agree that the islamic extremism is still more widespread that the christian extremism, but that's not the point here)

Or what about homosexuality? The Bible defines it as an "abomination", which is really what most anti-gay christians hang on to. The Bible also says that eating shrimp is an "abomination".. but I don't see groups of christians doing sit-ins in front of seafood restaurants.

Should we jump to the New Testament? How about 1 Corinthians? Women should not cut their hair. That's a cultural thing of their time. Women should be silent in church. That's across the board applicable to all time. ...Seriously??

I used to be able to do some pretty awesome mental gymnastics to justify, explain away, believe some of this stuff and now I'm just.. How in the world did I do that??????

As Walt Whitman said:

Re-examine all you have been told. Dismiss what insults your soul.

Q: Do you place your soul above everything else (=God)?

A: Don't you?

Here's another good one: I don't believe in hell. Definitely not in an eternal hell as punishment for what we've done in this world. If there is a God and if he is just like christians claim him to be, how can ETERNAL be a fair and just punishment for VERY SHORT LIFE in view of eternity? We have no chance. I'm not gonna get deep into this. I understand a very good book that explains all this is Hope Beyond Hell. There is also an online free version if you're inclined to read it, but you don't want to buy it.

Another - to me - mental exercise has been about Free Will. Everybody says that it was the love of God that gave us free will, because he didn't want robots. And we don't want to be robots, right? Well.. first of all, we would have never known. So that last question is just not applicable. But, let's say he wanted to show his love by giving us free will. How is it though, that he punishes for exercising it? (and the punishment, see previous point, is eternal) How is that better or more loving than creating robots? And, really, do some people have a choice? If I were born in a communist dictatorship or in an islamic country there is a good chance I wouldn't even have the option of exercising my free will to "accept Christ" because indoctrinated into another belief. That's fair?

All this said, I can't shake the fact that in the end I believe there is something/someone bigger than us. I can't explain otherwise why we are capable of thinking beyond us. I can't explain why we would even consider a God. It seems to me that would go against evolution. From an evolutionary standpoint, it doesn't make sense that we'd delve into matters that ultimately don't contribute to the survival. We could be animals and not being aware of any of this, trying to just survive and help the species survive (our offspring) and our life would be much easier and smoother.

However, this "God" (not even sure how to define it, for fear of having some labels that don't belong to me anymore applied to my thought) I just don't think resembles the God I've been spoon fed and I've self-brainwashed myself into believing all these years.

I think God is "hidden" in life and love, at every level, more than we ever realized.

Life is my religion. :)

Created or creator?

I used to say that "they" (which basically meant anybody who didn't have the same idea of God as me) created God in their own image.

Now, I do not understand that statement anymore.

I mean, we all create God in our own image. Every time someone uses a Scripture to describe God, he creates God in his own image. And that is because he uses his own MIND, INTERPRETATION, CULTURAL BACKGROUND, EDUCATION, EXPOSURE TO EXTERNAL INFLUENCE, PERSONAL EXPERIENCE AND HISTORY, UPBRINGING to create in his head an idea of who or what God is, was, and wants. Often discarding other passages that might contradict such idea (christians are really good at mental gymnastics and/or picking and choosing)

Yes. I do create God in my own image. And so do you. I have no problem with that anymore.
And if He's God, He'll understand and tolerate.
Even love, maybe. :)


(because if I'm destined to pick and choose, I'll choose a God who loves, over anything else, every time)

In essence.

The essence of religion, as is of business, is relating to others as long as they buy your product and it's based on the arrogant assumption that you know what will help them, or what they need.

The essence of life is a broader sense of relationship, that includes the good, the bad, the ugly and the different.

Life.. is my religion.

Tired?

Do you ever get tired of trying to figure out who God is? What He means by what He reveals in the Bible? If He's an inclusivist or an exclusivist (a hot topic currently)? What He wants from you? What does "God" really mean?

I have moments in which I get so tired. Mentally.
I go in circles. Back and forth, yes and no, whys and why-nots, punishment and forgiveness.. and the list could go on and on. It gets tiring and old.

I can hardly figure out myself, with whom I've spent over forty years, 24/7, much less God, with my limited understanding. I can't even know why I feel or not feel certain things, and I have the.. audacity? arrogance? illusion? ..to try and figure out God?

Sometimes I just want to live.

Extreme thinking and a certain type of language...

As I have said before here, I've changed a lot lately. I've distanced myself from a lot of stuff, stemming mainly from me distancing myself from a certain type of christianity and, even more so, from a certain idea of "church".

Part of that distancing resulted in me not quite understanding anymore a certain "christian" lingo, which now, at the very least, doesn't make sense to me, often just bounces off me, and occasionally even irritates me.

One such often used expression is "Lord of my/your life".

What exactly does that mean?

I've been asked recently, "Is He lord of your life?" referring to Jesus/God, of course.

First of all, is that even "biblical" language? I'm having a hard time finding that Jesus ever said "I am/will be lord of your life". Please correct me, if there is such Bible verse.

But, again, what does it mean?

There is another concept that somehow seems to be clashing with this one. Another one of those non-biblical terms that is used a lot, though. And it's the concept of "Free Will".

If I have Free Will, wouldn't that imply that whatever decision I make I am ultimately the lord of my life?

Even when I decide to submit to a "Lord", it is still my ultimate decision, and I submit to my understanding of what that Lord requires from me (so, is my mind my lord?) Or - even - I may submit to someone else's idea/explanation of what Lord requires, which, again, makes them somehow my lord, doesn't it?

From what I understand Lord and Master are used interchangeably, and that would mean that if there is a lord there is also a slave or a servant. And now that concept clashes with Free Will, again. A servant or a slave cannot have Free Will. Someone may say that when you submit to Lord you do renounce to your Free Will, and follow His Will. But that's not true. Because we keep doing over and over again our own Will, by sinning, by interpreting Lord's will, by making decisions, de facto overriding constantly our "willingness" to let him be Lord.

As I said.. it doesn't make sense to me, anymore.

But what does make sense (in light of my previous somewhat convoluted reasoning) is what Jesus says in John 15:15

I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.

Now, I can live with a Lord who is not a Master, but a friend.
:)

What are you afraid of?

Besides the obvious physical instances, is fear ever a good motivator?

What would justify and make succumbing to fear right?

What about love? "There is no fear in love"

Can it really be?? How?

Practically speaking what does it mean?

Never mind.

Please, do understand...

Is it more important to be known or to be understood?

Is there a difference?

According to my friend Ray the number one need for a thinker is to be understood.

I'm a thinker. My number one need is.. to be understood.

Now, define "understood".

What does it mean for me?

Can you be understood without being known?

Lots of people know some stuff about me.

Some people know lots of stuff about me. They know "facts". They know the things I'm going through. And sometimes they understand some of what I'm going through. I'm thankful for that.

And still, there is a deeper understanding that I so rarely experience. It's something that goes so down deep that it's even hard to explain. It is an understanding that goes beyond knowledge of facts. Some understand me so deeply without even knowing stuff about me. It's like they are already a part of me, and I'm a part of them. Like we are made of the same dough. And nothing, not circumstances, not distance, not different life choices, nothing - can ever change that.

I said I rarely experience it, but I do experience it. I have those kinds of connections in my life. It's a blessing. Sometimes also a little bit of a curse, because everything else pales in comparison.

Mostly a blessing, though.

I can be understood without being known.

Knowledge is just gravy in those cases.

:)